Thoughts from daily Bible reading for today – January 15, 2016
But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one. Matthew 5:37, NKJV
From time to time I play mind games that become mentally exhausting and relationally unhealthy. Because of my need for approval and my fear of rejection—I can choose the path of least resistance—harmony—over a vulnerable course of action: healthy conflict. A short term false humility only masks my pride—instead of revealing my scared soul to those who can help me and learning to rest in a long term reliance on the Lord. A person with humble candor frees others to be real, while those who cover up their true feelings create a culture of false security.
Jesus addresses the wisdom of sincere conversations, which then become seeds that grow into authentic living. Truth spoken in love makes the recipient of what can be cold, hard facts—feel the relational warmth of feeling understood and valued. Wise and gracious words promote instruction. Prayerful directness addresses the real issues, while offering ways to help solve the problem. Jesus’ words—full of the Spirit—spoke to the heart and mind with life-giving clarity.
“The Spirit gives life; the flesh counts for nothing. The words I [Jesus] have spoken to you—they are full of the Spirit and life” (John 6:63).
We all know the value of direct conversations: “Just to be clear, I can help you for three months, but afterwards I need to care for my mom who is moving in with us.” or “After much thought and prayer, I do not have peace about giving time or money to this project—it is not my area of passion and I do not believe the Holy Spirit is leading me to participate.” A culture of candor flushes out fears and protects against misplaced expectations and passive aggressive behaviors.
A culture of candor at work looks out for one another by addressing work habits that may not be healthy. If you notice an associate whose emotional intelligence is less than adequate, help them learn to listen more and talk less. Perhaps a peer consistently sends emails and copies too many people. Discuss with them the value of direct conversation by phone or in person and not to rely on impersonal electronic information that may or may not be understood. Also, bravely set the example and ask for candid feedback from friends and colleagues. Honest evaluation leads to better decisions, a more efficient process and improved execution. Candor creates trust.
“The one who has knowledge uses words with restraint, and whoever has understanding is even-tempered” “The wise in heart are called discerning, and gracious words promote instruction” (Proverbs 17:27, 16:21).
Prayer: Heavenly Father, thank You for Your very real and life-giving words to my heart, mind and soul.
Application: How can I facilitate a culture of candor at work and home? What are ways I can be real about my feelings and ask for honest feedback?
Related Readings: Job 2:10, 6:24; Proverbs 12:18, 16:24, 17:28; Luke 20:21; John 2:22
Post/Tweet this today: A culture of candor flushes out fears and protects against misplaced expectations. #WisdomHunters #cultureofcandor
Worship Resource: 9 minute video – Bethel: Mercy
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