“Parenting doesn’t stop when your children grow up—it just changes.”
Thoughts from daily Bible reading for today – April 7, 2025
All your children will be taught by the Lord, and great will be their peace. Isaiah 54:13
Isaiah reminds us that the Lord never stops loving and teaching our adult children. We don’t need to strive or try to make things happen; instead, we can take heart in knowing that God is still shaping the hearts of our children, even when they leave our home. The Holy Spirit serves as their guide and peacemaker. With four grown daughters and four sons-in-law, my wife Rita and I are learning to release our need to control outcomes and trust that the Lord will lead and teach our grown children. Parenting doesn’t stop when your children grow up—it just changes. Your role shifts from being the authority figure to being a trusted advisor, encourager, and friend. Here’s how you can navigate this new season of parenthood while maintaining a strong, healthy relationship with your adult children. How to Relate to Your Adult Children in a Healthy Way:
Shift from Authority to Influence. Your kids are grown now, which means they don’t need a parent telling them what to do—they need someone they can trust for guidance. Instead of making decisions for them, offer wisdom when they ask. Respect their independence and trust that the values you instilled in them will help guide their choices. Listen More, Talk Less. Nothing strengthens a relationship like feeling heard. Make it a habit to ask questions about their life and genuinely listen. Instead of jumping in with advice right away, sometimes they just need you to be present and supportive. Let them share their struggles, dreams, and joys without fear of judgment. Respect Their Boundaries. Your adult children are building their own lives, and that means they need a healthy space. If they don’t call as often as you’d like, don’t take it personally—they’re busy figuring things out. Instead of demanding constant communication, trust their love for you. Let them set the pace for how often they want to connect, and when they do reach out, make it a positive experience. While I was writing just now, my son-in-law called. In his words, he needed to process a problem. I suggested he spend a day in silence at a retreat center to hear God’s heart. We closed our phone call with a prayer of wisdom for one another.
Keep Encouraging, Not Controlling. Even though they’re adults, they still need your encouragement. Celebrate their achievements, cheer them on, and remind them of how proud you are. Instead of saying, “You should do this,” try, “I’m so proud of you, and I’m here if you ever need advice.” This approach makes them feel supported, not pressured. Pray for Them Daily. Even if they don’t always seek your advice, they always need your prayers. Pray for their faith, their relationships, their careers, and their well-being. God is working in their lives, even when you can’t see it. Trust that He is guiding them, just as He guided you. Enjoy the Friendship That Develops. One of the greatest gifts of having adult children is the friendship that can grow between you. Find shared interests, laugh together, and enjoy their company. As your relationship shifts from parent-child to lifelong friends, you’ll see that the love and bond you’ve built is stronger than ever. Relating to your adult children isn’t about holding on—it’s about walking alongside them. When they know they can trust you as a loving, supportive presence, your relationship will continue to grow and thrive for years to come.
Support your adult children, and they will want to come home to be loved and encouraged.
Prayer
Lord, help me support my adult children with wisdom, patience, and love. Guide me to encourage them without control, pray for them daily, and trust You with their journey. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Application
What prayer does your child need from you? What makes them feel loved?
Related Reading
Proverbs 22:6; Philippians 1:6; 1 Thessalonians 5:11; 3 John 1:4
Worship Resource
Hillsong Worship: Still
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